Thoughts from an UltraMarathon…

It has been almost two months since I ran the Lakefront 50. I have had two months to process my feelings regarding race day and the season as a whole. Please note that this might be long, but I truly hope you read it.

This season was such an incredible journey. When I stepped out in faith to set two big goals, I was scared. I was constantly second guessing my ability to train my body for 50 miles, and I often feared people would laugh or scoff when they heard I was trying to raise $20,000. As always, God put people in my life to reassure me that this was what I was supposed to be doing in 2017.

Early on in my fundraising, family friends committed to donating each month to my page. This jumpstarted my belief we could all change a lot of lives together. For my birthday in April, I had numerous people help me run and come to my birthday party fundraiser. These two events helped me believe that raising at least $10,000 was possible for the third year in a row.

A huge fear of mine didn’t have anything to do with race day. I was simply doubtful I had it in me to actually train properly for a 50 mile race. I kept looking at different race training plans, and I truly believed there was no way my body would allow me to log that many miles. Plus, how in the world would I even find that much time to train?

Thankfully I have incredible friends who also dream big and have hearts for Africa. As I watched friends train for IronMan, I slowly convinced myself I could do the same. When I read about people running the Longest Day Marathon, I was inspired to keep going.  Facebook can actually be a pretty motivating platform JAs I helped lead the Blaine Group Run, I realized that I could follow my own advice. One run at a time.

I also have friends who were willing to give up their own time to help me train. My friend Jen wasn’t even training for a race, but she ran with me almost every Sunday morning so that I could always have company on my back to back weekend runs. My friend Holly woke up bright and early many times so that I could beat the heat or the rain during my long weekday runs. I had an entire entourage when I completed my 31 mile training run.  Plus, that day alone, friends and family donated almost $1500!!! I seriously have the best people in my life.

The Twin Cities Marathon was another definite destination on my journey, and it is a day I won’t forget. Simply running to run without any goal in mind was fantastic. I loved being with Amy, and we even survived the HORRIBLE weather. My hamstring injury was there, but it wasn’t bad. The best way I can describe it is by simply saying my hamstring was saying hi. It wasn’t overly painful, it was just noticeable. When I woke up the next day with only hamstring pain and zero soreness in any other muscle, I felt confident that I could truly run a 50 mile race.

And this is where my story took a slight turn. When I woke up from the Twin Cities marathon without added soreness, I was stoked. For the first time ever, I could walk up and down stairs without a problem post marathon. To be honest, I could have used a dose of humility, as I was pretty proud of this. I should have also been smart and taken time off. Instead, I ran full out on that Tuesday. I felt great during the run and was once again a bit too proud. The next day, my hamstring wasn’t happy.

For the remaining couple of weeks, I dealt with a nagging hamstring. I never felt the need to take any time off to rest, but I did cut a few runs a couple miles short. In retrospect, I should have taken extra time right after TCM to let my body heal properly. I didn’t, so race day fell apart.

Race Day was COLD. This did not make my already angry hamstring any happier. I also had stomach issues that kept me visiting the porta potty. By mile ten, I was doubting my ability to run 50 miles. If you follow me on FB, you know that I almost quit after mile 25. Despite being on track to finish with plenty of time at the halfway point, I knew it would be rough, and I wasn’t sure I had it in me. But I kept going.  Thanks to constant crying out to God, perfectly timed prayers and donations from family and friends, and my older brother, I crossed that finish line. It was ugly, and I was a blubbering mess, but I did it.

If I am honest, I was rather angry on race day and for a couple of weeks after the fact. I trained so hard for that day, and it was disappointing to barely finish (if all had gone according to plam, I should have finished at least an hour sooner and with at least some energy). I was in so much pain that I could barely move. My hamstring was shot, my quad was super swollen, and I had blisters all over both feet. I felt stupid for even trying.

But the more I thought about it, the more I realized, it wasn’t about me. Unfortunately, though, it had become about me. I was so focused on accomplishing 50 miles that I forgot why I set that big goal in the first place. I was so proud of being able to cross off mile after mile on my training plan that I forgot to focus on the kiddos who needed me to advocate on their behalf. In short, I made it about me, and that was my mistake.

I don’t necessarily believe God was punishing me on race day, but I believe that race day happened the way it did for a reason. Being in pain made me cry out to God in a way that has only happened one other time in my life. Bleeding blisters made me admit that there was NO way I could do this on my own. Barely finishing made me remember that I don’t do this for my benefit. I do this so that others can have life. I do this as a way of honoring God. I do this so that kiddos in Africa can feel the love of Jesus through my running and fundraising. I choose to run so that others don’t have to.

And that my friends is the condensed (ha!) version of my 2017 journey J

I am still seeking support, so if you want to still donate, you have a few days! If we can get 23 clean water donations in the next three days, a total of 200 people will have new life this year. Let's see how many lives we can change!!!

https://www.teamworldvision.org/index.cfm?fuseaction=donordrive.participant&participantID=65097

Happy 35th Birthday to ME!!!

This year I turned 35 years old, and I celebrated in true TWV fashion...by running lots of miles and seeking donations :)

As many know, I am training to become an #ultramom while simultaneously attempting to raise a family lifetime total of $50,000 for Team World Vision. My race isn't until October, but training is well underway. In fact, for the month of April, I ran 146.65 miles. This is actually a record for me...it is the most amount of miles I have ever logged in one month. Ever. And that number will only keep climbing.

Training is tricky. I am already running more miles than I normally do towards the end of marathon training season, and I am technically still in Base Training. It's mind boggling to think that my numbers are simply going to keep climbing. My legs are tired, and sometimes I just want to give up. Yet, my heart is so full. My boys are seeing me train for something HARD, and my friends and family are rallying behind me to help change lives. So let's be honest, the 24 hours I spent running this month were tiring and hard but TOTALLY WORTH IT! There were 720 total hours in the month of April. Calculating this out put my running in perspective for me. Scheduling time to run is hard, but it is completely doable when you get creative. Sometimes I have to get up early; other days I have to stay up late to finish work because I ran in the middle of the day, but when I am reminded of the kiddos who walk hours and hours EVERY day to fetch water, it makes my creative planning and sacrifices worth it. I am also fortunate that my kiddos can log a couple of miles with me every now and then. Our conversations are pretty fantastic during our runs, and nothing else competes for my attention when our feet hit the pavement together. It's pretty amazing actually.

Since I am in the habit of running back to back long runs, I decided I wanted to push myself a bit for my birthday. I am not going to lie, it was a struggle to come up with what to do that matched my birthday numbers in some way. I didn't want to run 35 miles because I was afraid to mess with training too much and wind up hurt, but I also wanted to do something more than what was planned for that weekend. I wanted to get friends and family out with me to help me log miles, and I hoped that people would donate to encourage me along the way. Since my birthday is on the 23rd, I settled for a 23K...back to back. This would be ten more miles than I needed to run that weekend (according to my training plan), so it would be difficult, but I trusted it wouldn't cause in injury. So my birthday weekend was born. I threw in a taco party for good measure, and my heart was bursting just thinking about it.

The amount of cheese I ate that weekend is just not even close to being good for you, but it was so much fun hanging out at my house and stuffing my face. In the end, I actually ran 50K that weekend. I overshot the second run, so I knew I was fairly close to the 50K when I finished. Kelsey suggest I tell the world of Facebook what happened. I followed her lead and challenged my friends to donate extra. I promised to go back out if two more people gained access to clean water. Sure enough, less than 5 minutes later, I was back out because three people jumped in to donate. I seriously have the best support system (and friends who like to torture me while simultaneously saving lives!).

So many people supported me on this journey, and I am continually grateful. This is my 7th year with Team World Vision, and I am constantly amazed at the number of people who continually donate on my behalf. I get a text alert every time someone donates, and my face lights up EVERY. SINGLE. TIME. It doesn't matter the amount. Donations mean that lives are changing, but they also mean that family and friends are by my side on this journey to solving the clean water crisis through World Vision.

Happy 8th Birthday, Grayson!

Dear Grayson,

Today you turn 8 years old. Eight years ago, you were placed in my arms, and our family of four became complete. You are growing up so incredibly fast, but thankfully your little body is tinier than most your age. You likely want to be bigger, but I love that you still fit perfectly in my arms.

At 45 pounds, you weigh what your little brother did at 5 years old. But man, you can pack some punch into that little body of yours. Your muscles are strong, and your legs are fast. You can run an 8 minute mile, and I think one day you could give Ninja Warrior a run for their money :)

Math is still your thing. You ask Griffin and me to make up math problems for you ALL. THE. TIME. When you finish tests early at school, your teacher often finds you doubling numbers over and over and over again. You talk often about how you want to be a math teacher or an engineer when you grow up, and your Lego Building Skills are on point.

This summer you will be participating in Summer Academy, a three week learning experience for high achieving students. You are SO SO SO excited to go that you ask constantly how many more days until it starts. You decided not to go back to Trout Lake Camp this year. I think you are a homebody like your father.

You also LOVE Board Games. You love to play Monopoly, Mastermind, Sleeping Queens, and Guesturres. I am simply waiting for the day you fall in love with Pictionary :)

You still play tennis, and you were stoked to find out you moved up to the next level for the final spring session. Again, you are always the smallest one on the court, but you can hustle!!! You and Griffin talk often about being doubles partners when you grow up. I would LOVE that :) Speaking of Griffin, the two of you have an incredible bond. It is truly a blessing to watch the two of you together.

50 for 50. YES, I am crazy.

2017 is going to be different. 2017 is going to be HARD. 2017 is stretching me in ways I never anticipated. But by golly, 2017 has me joining a new church, finishing out my first year as a professor, and it WILL have me crossing the finish line of 50 miles and $50,000.

Almost seven years ago, I signed up to run my first half marathon. Almost four years ago, I signed up to run my first full marathon. Two and a half years ago I declared I would NEVER run an ultramarathon. But Here I am. I have set a goal to run 50 miles and raise a lifetime total of $50,000 for Team World Vision. So what does "Here I am" look like for me this year?

I can't lie to you. I am SCARED OUT OF MY MIND. I am a fairly confident person, and I tend to set big goals. But this one scares me. I am still in base training, and I am already running more than 100 miles a month. I am reading about stretching, fueling, shoes, etc., and these are subjects I thought I already mastered. My legs are constantly sore, and my body is tired. Declaring that the Twin Cities Marathon will be a training run makes this sound impossible. Fundraising is awkward, and it's humbling to continue to ask people to donate their time and their resources.  But my heart is full. I am continuing to spread the love of Jesus, and my boys continue to learn that we can ALL do hard things. I also have AMAZING friends and family who are rallying behind me in any way they can. I have running partners, financial supporters, people who simply encourage me with words/cards/emails, and a husband who comes alongside me in any way he can. God continues to remind me that I am NOT on this journey alone, and we go farther together. I am scared. I am tired. But Here I am.

So many people shake their head in disbelief when they find out I am training to run my first ultra marathon (50 miles). I get it. Running 50 miles can seem crazy. But that's not the point. The point is that I have legs that work and a heart for Jesus. God is continuing to remind me that I am a daughter of THE KING, and my story matters. What I do with my story matters. Running 50 miles isn't crazy. Rasing $50,000 isn't crazy. What is crazy is that there are kids in Africa who die because they don't have access to clean water.

God constantly invites us to join Him. So Here I am. Running more miles than I ever imagined I would. It's hard. Sometimes it downright sucks. But I am doing it. I serve an incredible God who gave me the ability to do big things in His name. So when I hear people tell me I am crazy, it simply fuels my fire. Because I am crazy. Crazy about Jesus. Crazy about clean water. Because Water is Life. And EVERYone deserves a chance at life.

Be crazy with me by clicking the link below :)

http://www.teamworldvision.org/index.cfm?fuseaction=donordrive.participant&participantID=65097